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Everyday Risk and Feeling Safe Every Day, Is That A Contradiction?

Everyday Risk Is A Reality

"You have to feel safe because you can't always be safe". This is what I tell all my students. You should do all that you can to feel safe because the everyday risk is a reality.

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That does not mean that you should not resist the illusion of safety (you may have to subscribe to get to this link), but it does mean that you have to work within the bounds of that which any normal person can possibly be expected to allow for. Anything beyond that is an act of faith.

By telling all my students that they have to feel safe I make it possible for them to make a choice that has half a chance of being something that will be safer than what they are facing when they don't.

For example: if they are being confronted by a bully what would make them feel safe? If they choose to hide it needs to be possible to hide. If they choose to run, it needs to be possible to run. Fighting back works but it is not always the best option and if it doesn't make you feel safe it is of no real help to you.

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Training

Neither am I suggesting that one should not train. If you have training or you practice a particular action, as long as you don't panic the chances are that your training will carry you through.

For example: At my work, we had a very real life-threatening situation and the people who dealt with it had trained for such a situation on a regular basis. Upon talking to them about the event afterwards, they all said to me that they were impressed that as long as they did not panic their training carried them through. In fact, one of the main reasons for them not panicking was the fact that they knew they had trained for this very situation.

None of us likes to admit it but everyday risk and feeling safe every day is not a contradiction. Things go wrong no matter how well trained you are. But if you train to feel safe there is a good chance that you will do just the right thing when you are confronted with something that doesn't make you feel safe.







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