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Managing Reactions to Boundaries - Kidpower Shorts – Episode 8

Managing Negative Reactions To Boundaries

This video from Kidpower International is from their series of video shorts and provides helpful tips and strategies for dealing with negative reactions to the setting of personal boundaries.

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Setting personal boundaries can be challenging, especially if someone reacts negatively, and it can be easy to feel guilty or unsure of oneself when met with a negative response. However, it is important to persist in protecting your boundaries and taking charge of your feelings.

One of the most challenging aspects of setting boundaries is managing emotional triggers. When our boundaries are challenged or violated, it's normal to feel upset or triggered. It's important to note that strong boundaries do not need to be rigid.

Sometimes It's Necessary To Lower Our Boundaries

Sometimes it's necessary to lower our boundaries or change our minds about what our boundaries actually are. For example, we might adjust our boundaries as we get to know someone better, or as we understand more about someone's situation. We might also decide to be strategic in how and where we set our boundaries in order to keep an important relationship with a family member, friend, or colleague.

Adverse reactions to boundaries are normal, even if the person reacting has good intentions. Sometimes people lack communication skills, or they may be struggling with personal challenges that make it difficult for them to listen. In some cases, they may try to minimize or deny the concern, shift the conversation to their own needs, or try to make the other person feel guilty for setting boundaries.

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Some Emotional Safety Techniques

In order to persist in protecting our boundaries, we need to use some emotional safety techniques such as the calm down power, the trash can skill, or the that's not true skill. These can help individuals remain calm and focused in the face of negative reactions to their boundaries. Additionally, positive responses such as acknowledging the other person's feelings, expressing care, and restating boundaries can help defuse negative reactions.

If someone continues to disrespect or ignore your boundaries, it may be necessary to spend less time with them or seek help from someone in a position of authority, such as a teacher, boss, or counsellor. 

It is important to prepare what you want to say and do, practise out loud in front of a mirror, and be ready with positive responses in case of negative reactions.

In Conclusion

Setting and protecting boundaries can be challenging, especially when met with negative reactions. However, by being prepared, using emotional safety techniques, and persisting in protecting one's boundaries, individuals can maintain healthy relationships and prioritize their own needs and well-being.

See more Kid Power Shorts videos about managing emotional triggers for helpful tips on how to manage these feelings.

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