Self-Defense: Voice Projection For Kids

Voice Projection For Kids Self Defence

Voice projection is an important skill for kids to learn as it helps them communicate effectively and confidently in various settings such as school, public speaking events, or performances. But while it is primarily seen as an effective tool for such things it can also be used as a self-defence technique for kids in threatening situations.

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Richard

Commanding Tone

The use of a commanding tone teaches kids to use a commanding tone when speaking in a threatening situation. This involves speaking firmly and confidently to assert their presence and intimidate the attacker.

The use of well-projected short and simple commands teaches kids to use such commands like a Hard "Stop!" or "Back off!" to convey their message quickly and effectively. All the while making eye contact with the attacker when speaking to them. This helps to establish dominance and lets the attacker know that the child is not intimidated.

A well-projected voice helps to make use of assertive body language because good posture is imperative in order to be most effective. Standing up straight, holding their head high, and placing their feet firmly on the ground. This helps to convey confidence and assertiveness.

Children should be taught to be very loud but not to yell. A very loud and assertive voice need not be a yell. A loud and forceful voice can startle and give pause to anyone approaching giving a child options including the opportunity to escape.

Kids using their voices to seek help from nearby people or authorities is an excellent way to encourage getting help or calling out to someone nearby if they are in danger.

Things in Common With Voice Projection For Adults

There are things about voice projection for self-defence in Kids that are in common with adults. Such as:

• Important This is Not Screaming.

Screaming is a very useful tool but you have to know how to use it so it will be discussed in another blog post. Incorrectly used can create unwanted aggression.

• Using Assertive Soft Language

Saying polite things such as “Excuse me can I help you” assertively when startled or uncomfortable about people's behaviour. Whilst maintaining a safe distance just in case.

• Set Boundaries:
• Use DE-escalating Language
• Never use the words “calmly"
• Avoid a blame game and Listen
• Use distraction techniques

You can find more detail on these under “Self-Defence: How To Use Your Voice Looking Out For Yourself” [LINK].

Whilst related to voice projection for adults in self-defence there are differences between Children and adults that need to be taken into account.

Children Calling For Help

Because children use the word "Help" in play, a lot, it is often ignored by others. Therefore teaching them to say “Fire” to get the initial attention.

At Newport Judo we teach the children to use the words, “Your Not My Dad/Mum”. These are some very effective words. I can attest to their power by relating the following.

I had a student I had taught these words to. I knew both him and his dad quite well. I just happened to be in the supermarket one day when he got very angry with his dad and he shouted at the top of his voice “You're Not My Dad” just as I had taught him.

People came it seemed from everywhere.

Including security.

As I said I was there, which was fortunate as I was able to assure the security that the adult was defiantly his father and the child just simply got angry with him.

I must say, in light of this instance, “You're Not My Dad/Mum” is all that most Children will need in an emergency with an adult.

Also, since that incident, I have made sure I educate the students that these words are a superpower. I then teach them that with great power comes great responsibility.

Other Incidental Benefits Of Kids Learning Voice Projection

Aside from the self defences considerations there are some other incidental benefits of kids learning voice projection.

• Breathing

Practice breathing exercises helps with control in an emergency.

• Good posture

Good posture helps the muscle responsible for breathing.

• Speak clearly

Proper enunciation reminds them to speak slowly and take their time to pronounce each word.

• Practice in a large space

Teaches how to project their voice to reach a larger audience.

• Practice speaking loudly

Helps develop their vocal strength and endurance. Also, help with singing which in turn helps to develop the vocal cords and use of microphones and amplification.

Remember, learning voice projection takes time and practice. Encourage kids to keep practising and be patient with themselves as they develop this important skill.

It's important to note that voice projection alone may not always be effective in self-defence situations, especially against larger or more experienced attackers. Kids should also be taught other self-defence techniques like basic martial arts, how to escape from grabs, and how to use objects as weapons. However, voice projection can be a useful tool in situations where physical self-defence is not possible.

Fear, Frustration, Anger Safety- Kidpower Shorts - Episode 4

Kidpower Shorts - Episode 4: Emotional Safety - Fear, Frustration, Anger

Today we're talking about emotional safety and how to keep yourself safe around anger and other upset feelings such as frustration and fear, whether these feelings come from yourself or from someone else around you.

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Lots of challenging things happen in our personal lives, in the lives of people close to us and in the world in general. A lot of times these challenging things can cause lots of upset feelings such as fear frustration and anger.

Having lots of upset feelings can make people behave in ways that are less safe either for themselves or for the people around them. Fortunately, there are lots of skills you can learn to help keep yourself and other people safe around anger fear and other upset feelings.

What causes upset feelings?

It may be the actions of a specific person, the actions of many people or events completely outside anyone's control such as natural disasters or rude words.

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Something that causes someone to explode with feelings in this way is called a trigger. Triggers can be all sorts of different things and can be very different from each other. It is helpful to start being aware of your own triggers and of the triggers of the people around you so that you can take care of your safety.

This video is about a number of ways that can help you deal with lots of upset feelings such as fear frustration and anger and being aware of others with upset such feelings so that you can be safe if and when they occur.

There's more about everything we teach online at https://www.kidpower.org/

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Richard

Forcing Kids To Show Affection Could Be Dangerous

Forcing Kids To Show Affection Could Be Dangerous

Even though kids are able to enthusiastically communicate their feelings, many now believe that they should be allowed to decide when to communicate those feelings.

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And if a child is expressing apprehension being around someone, we should be paying attention to them. If they are forced to hug people that they don't want to hug, they learn that they do not have complete control over their own bodies. We shouldn't be teaching children that they are offending someone for not giving them the physical affection they're asking for.

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Key Takeaways:

• Some people have warned that forcing children to hug sends the message that they do not control their bodies.
• High-fives are a way for children to give polite greetings without being forced to hug.
• There are books for helping children as young as three learn about boundaries and consent.

"When my child was a 6-year-old, I used to enthusiastically encourage him to hug and kiss his friends or family members." Perhaps this is not always appropriate? 

Read more: https://www.creativehealthyfamily.com/forcing-kids-to-show-affection/

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Richard

Emotional Safety 2 - Negative Self-Talk & Judo

Kidpower Shorts - Episode 5: Emotional Safety 2 - Negative Self-Talk and Judo

This video is about negative self-talk. Something we all do when we don't feel good enough. One of the things that Judo did for me when I was a child was to help me establish confidence when I realised that I could fall and not get hurt. But more importantly, I discovered I was good at something. Perhaps not the best but nevertheless pretty good. It's hard to be negative when you are thinking about something other than yourself... Judo that is.

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Sport may not be what you are good at but there will be something and there will always be someone out there that you can befriend. It's just a matter of keeping on trying. I know that is not good grammar but it is intentional.

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The main gist of this video is to keep looking for someone to talk to and to look for something that you are good at. You don't have to be the best at it but good nevertheless. Don't, whatever you do, talk to yourself or let someone talk you out of looking for someone to talk to and something you can be good at even if it takes a lot of practice.

Enjoy
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Richard

Online Privacy Information: Kidpower Shorts - Episode 3

Kidpower Shorts - Episode 3: Online Privacy Information

Most of us are aware that there is some information that is very unsafe to have publicly accessible online. For example, your home address; your passwords to important accounts; your financial information and many other things. However, internet safety is often much more complex than it first appears. This "Kid Power Shorts" today we are talking about an issue that is relevant to everyone using the internet online privacy.

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First, let's get some things straight. Some words information or photographs are actually illegal and should never be online. Whether content is legal or illegal for you to share will vary based on your country and your age and you will need to check with your local authorities to see what is allowed in your area. In addition, it may be against the law to share someone else's private information. Even if it is legal it is not okay to share anyone's private information without their consent. If you want to share someone else's private information, just check first with them to make sure it's okay.

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In this video, (below) we will be focusing on how to handle personal words, information or photographs, that are legal, ethical and yours to share. First off what do we mean by private? A good definition is that something is private when you would not be happy to share it with everyone in the world. Another good word for this is personal. Some things can be personal and private. For example, your name address and place of work and study are personal information and your thoughts and feelings are also personal. Different people vary and what personal information they consider to be private information.

You may wish to keep all sorts of personal things private such as your thoughts, opinions, photos, taste and music and you may have another friend who thinks that none of these things is private at all. Some things should never be public online such as the login information to your bank account. Some personal things do not get to be private. For example, if you want a driver's license you do not get to keep your name private. Additionally, you should share private information with your doctor when it is relevant. Some of these exchanges of information will take place online but only under certain circumstances and these people are legally bound to protect your private information from misuse.

In this video, we are talking about personal information, where you have a choice about whether or not to keep it private. One good rule of thumb is that you should never put something online if you would not be happy with the whole world seeing it. This sounds like an easy rule to follow but it can be surprisingly easy to slip up and accidentally share more than you intended when you are in an online space such as a Facebook group comment section or chat room. You are in public and it is important that you remain aware of how much personal information you are giving out.

It can be easy to give away lots of information without realizing it. For example, telling someone about a concert you went to on a specific day can tell someone which city you are in. Photos often have location data. If the photo is of a public place such as a tourist attraction this might be fine but if the photo is of your house you might prefer not to share that information with someone. You don't need to be afraid of posting or sharing but you should be aware of potential problems. So you can make conscious informed decisions about what is safe for you. For example, most people don't want their home address to be public but are still happy with their country of residence being public.

Think for yourself or talk to someone you trust about where your boundaries are and accept that other people may feel differently. You may find that others are more or less comfortable with different levels of privacy. Remember being a good digital citizen involves respecting other people's boundaries online.

It is not appropriate to shame someone for sharing less information than you do. Just because they don't want to tell you something does not mean that they think you are a bad person or that you are trying to hurt them. They are probably just being cautious. Also, you should remember that your information belongs to you. Someone might be offended that you don't feel comfortable telling them something. Remember that you do not have to give away any information to be polite. Your safety is more important than anyone's embarrassment, inconvenience or offense.

Being careful to protect your privacy is important because once someone has your personal information or images you cannot take them back. You should understand that once you send someone your personal information they have the power to share it with other people, potentially without checking first with you. Yes even if you send it on a private platform such as Snapchat. Many people will not share your personal information but some people may wish to share your personal information to bother you and other people have different boundaries around their privacy and may not understand that sharing your personal information is not okay.

Sometimes you might want to share personal things with someone you love and trust, such as a close friend. These experiences can be very positive, important and meaningful to people however, sharing personal content online is not as safe as sharing in person. If someone you love and trust asks for personal information or images online you can set clear boundaries while still maintaining your relationship. Just because you are comfortable sharing something in person does not mean it is always safe to share that same thing online. Remember the best way to prevent private words ideas or images from being shared without your consent is to not make them available in the first place. When in doubt, wait to share your private information until you can do so in a safe space in person.

You can use your awareness to notice when you might give away personal information and make safe choices about whether or not to do so and you can use your boundary setting and digital citizenship skills to protect your personal information from others and accept when other people do not want to share their personal information with you.

You deserve to interact with others online, without giving away any more personal information than is comfortable and safe for you.

Thank you for watching kid power shorts. There is more information about everything we teach online at https://www.kidpower.org/

Enjoy
Sensai
Richard

Emotional Safety: Helping Kids Regain it After a Tragedy

Emotional Safety: Helping Kids Regain it After a Tragedy

There are quite a few things that you can do to help a child regain emotional safety after a tragedy.

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Obviously, this is a very rough time for the child and they are going to be vulnerable, so it's essential that you stay calm and give them a sense of normalcy. You also want to explain what happened to them in a way that is appropriate for their age. Finally, help them be comfortable with expressing their feelings.

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Key Takeaways:

• When adults sound anxious, it magnifies the emotional strain on children.
• In a time of tragedy, a child should not be burdened with an adult's sadness, worries or anger.
• Children might respond to a tragedy with physical ailments or regression into younger behaviours.

"The problem is that exposure to terrifying images and horrifying stories is often unnecessarily traumatizing for adults and kids alike. Seeing upsetting situations on TV can feel as if it is still happening right now, even though the event is over."

Read more: https://www.kidpower.org/library/article/regain-emotional-safety/?fbclid=IwAR19PJk45RfnB-wCeC86gaWkS4ZpATTKuXCfxWBF0Dsk7UmaejH-1yP0btM

Enjoy
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Richard

Digital Citizenship: Kidpower Shorts - Episode 2

Kidpower Shorts - Episode 2: Digital Citizenship

Here is another episode of Kidpower Shorts - Episode 2 and it is on Digital Citizenship Avery takes us through some very useful strategies on how to be a good digital citizen and how to manage those who are not.

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Hi I'm Avery,

Welcome to kid power shorts.

Today we're going to be talking about an increasingly important subject digital citizenship.

Now all of us are citizens of many things. We're citizens of communities citizens of countries and citizens of the world and by using the internet we're also digital citizens. Being a good digital citizen means interacting with other people online in ways that are respectful safe and legal.

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Now good digital citizenship may sound like a no-brainer but it can be surprisingly easy to break the safety rules online. Let's look at this from a couple of different perspectives some ways people can be unkind online includes posting and sharing mean private or embarrassing words information or photographs. A lot of times these things are intended as jokes but that doesn't mean that they're not hurtful.

It's hard to gauge someone's intent online and sometimes it's hard to tell what someone means with their words when you can't hear their tone of voice.

Imagine that you were online and someone that you knew and trusted shared some information about you that you thought had been kept private. Imagine that one of your friends sent some hurtful words over text. If I were receiving these messages I would probably feel scared sad and alone. One of the best things to do when someone you know and trust has done something hurtful to you online is to get help. You can get help from someone else you know or you can talk to them directly and respectfully. Address what hurt your feelings and how to make it better.

A really important thing to remember about digital citizenship is that a lot of times when people break the safety rules they do it by accident. Most people in the world are good and they're not actually trying to hurt anyone's feelings people, often accidentally break the safety rules because they're trying to make jokes and they don't understand that they won't be heard as jokes.

If you're communicating with someone online and you think that what you're about to send could be interpreted in a hurtful way, one thing to do is to rephrase your message.

But another way people break the safety rules is by saying things and sending things when they're very angry. Now although these things may feel honest and true at the moment they're often not things that you would say to someone's face or that you would say if you were feeling calmer. Remember your feelings belong to yourself someone may have done something that hurt your feelings or made you angry or made you feel afraid. It's okay to be upset but retaliating, especially online is not helpful. When you are emotionally triggered it can be very tempting to write long angry messages to whoever has upset you. This almost always makes your problem worse not better.

You can use your awareness to notice when people are being disrespectful online either to yourself or to other people. You can practice noticing when you get upset and stopping yourself from jumping forward and making triggered actions that could be destructive. Instead take a step back and think carefully about how to address the problem. If you really feel you need to get the words out you can write them down in a notes app or a piece of paper and don't send them wait until your calmer and then revisit those words. If there's still something that is appropriate to send over text you can send them. If there's something that you realize doesn't reflect who you are or who you want to be you can delete them without ever having anyone else know they exist. If there's something that still needs to be said but that is very large complicated or full of very strong feelings this is something that's better to be addressed in person.

You can come up with your own strategies for how to manage your feelings and prevent yourself from sending angry messages.

Sometimes you might witness someone else not being a good digital citizen. This gives you the opportunity to be a safety advocate. You can be a safety advocate in a couple of ways.

If the person engaging in online bullying behavior is someone you know well, you can approach them and have a respectful conversation about why you think their behavior is not okay. If you don't feel like you're in a position where you can talk to the person about their behavior another good strategy is to redirect and change the subject.

People who have been bullied online often feel upset and alone. Approaching these people can be very helpful to them. You can send them a message or talk to them in person and say that you don't support bullying and ask what you can do to help. Remember everyone needs support in different ways and manages their feelings and their challenges in different ways. Make sure to follow the other person's guidance when supporting them instead of assuming what they need.

Sometimes people are bullied online by a massive number of people all around the world you may not be able to reach out to the person. Being bullied in this case they might be someone who lives very far away who you've never talked to or even a public figure. This doesn't mean that you're powerless. Although you can't stop it from happening everywhere you can still choose not to engage in the bullying behavior yourself and you can talk to your friends family and other people you know about why you don't think they should engage in the bullying behavior either.

Just like in the real world you can be a good digital citizen and fully engaged with all of the great things the internet has to offer.

Thank you for watching kid power shorts remember you can find more information about kid power and all of the things that we teach on the website at kidpower.org.

Enjoy
Sensai
Richard

The Remarkable Benefits of Judo

Judo is Not just a martial art to use to fight people. Moreover, it is perfectly viable for children and as well as adults. It is perfectly viable in younger children too.

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Judo's considered one of the softer types of martial arts, making it useful for most people. It also teaches self-discipline, creates social and problem-solving skills and can even keep you in shape. This doesn't just go for adults either. This is perfectly viable in younger children too. It may even be more beneficial to their growth to have something important in their life like judo.

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Key Takeaways:

• Judo helps you become a better person by building your character and problem solving skills.
• Judo is also a great martial arts to use for self defense in the event you need to use it.
• Like most martial arts, practicing Judo is great cardio and will keep you in shape.

"It also leads to a state of mind shaped by judo principles such as maximum efficiency with minimal effort, balance between mind and body, safety, and mutual support to bring prosperity for yourself and others."

Read more: https://www.amakella.com/benefits-of-judo/

Enjoy
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Richard

Child Safety Tip: Rules For Defending against Lost Children

Child Safety Tip: Rules For Defending against Lost Children

What is your plan for your children when they get lost?
Do they know their Full name and address?
Do they know their phone number?
Do you have an "I'm lost rule"?

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If you are not working with your children on some sort of "I'm Lost plan" from a very young age you are going to at some point face the fear and panic that we did.

I have 4 children 3 of whom, at one time or another have gotten lost. I can tell you from a very painful personal experience that children getting lost are possibly the most distressing thing a parent can experience!

I was allowing my mind to wander the other day and thinking about the times my children and I got separated when they were little.

One of my children at about the age of 2 had no sense of direction at all and the prospect of him getting lost was just too much to contemplate. Then one day, despite our best efforts, it happened.

It must have only taken seconds.

We turned our heads and he was gone. In a department store of all places. We weren't far from the front entrance and were scared out of our minds that he might find his way to the street.

Frantically we searched the store!!

You hear people say that "it was the longest 15 minutes ever", but you don't appreciate that comment until you go through the second by second anguish of trying to fight back the panic.

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You know that if you don't win against that panic you have no chance of thinking logically as you can to find that lost child.

Your heart races and then you manage to slow it down just long enough to think of the next search. Then your mind races with all the possible things that could happen.

You stop yourself with the assurance that you are overreacting. You get calmer. And then it starts all over again.

We found him! Was it truly only about 15 minutes?

He was out the front of one of the ground-floor stores. He was as happy as Larry because the store security guard was standing with him and had shouted him an ice cream. He was never off reigns after that.

The one good thing about it was, that from that time on if he could not see us he would scream! This was both disconcerting and comforting.

Disconcerting because he only had to turn around (remember his sense of direction) and he would scream, even though we were right behind him. Comforting because we always knew where he was.

Unfortunately what we didn't realize was that this screaming rule didn't apply when he was with his older brother of 3(?). Some months later when we had decided that the rains were no longer necessary because of this screaming rule. We were in the hardware store at our local shopping centre. We noticed that it was too quiet behind us.

Of course, the two of them were gone! At least we were not near any open doors so we were reasonably certain they were still in the shopping centre.

After some minutes of desperate looking, we decided to enlist the help of the boy's auntie who at that time worked upstairs in Kmart. We arrived there only to find the boys happily sitting at the information desk as though they were a set of returned goods. The people on the desk had recognized them and realized they were looking for their auntie and waited till we came looking for them.

What had happened apparently was that when the older brother, who still to this day has his father's sense of direction (smile), could not see us, he decide that they had to find their auntie just as we did. His younger brother was completely comfortable as long as he was with his older brother hence no scream. A scary thought to say the least.

How to defend against a child's natural Ninja art of stealth

It was about at this point that we started to teach the boys a new rule that we have applied ever since. "If you can't see us, stand still we will find you".

We had to modify the rule when we were alerted to the concept of a person in authority telling them to come with them. So the rule became "If you can't see us, stand still we will find you. If someone says 'come with me and we will find your parents.' Tell them 'you go and find my parents we will stay here and wait for them'."

This rule has held us in good stead over the years. Even overseas where one of our other boys (12) lost us in the crowd. In Rome no less. Despite being very upset he stuck to his training and stood still.

One of the security people took him under his wing but let him stand right where he was. More or less any way they got him to stand to the side on a box. A great help actually. But he essentially stayed put. Of course, he was much much older than the other boys were. Nevertheless, it was good to know that his training held true from when he was little.

What is your plan for your children when they get lost?

Do they know their full name and address?

Do they know their phone number?

Do you have a rule like ours?

Take a child safety tip from me. If you are not working with your children on some sort of "I'm Lost Plan" from a very young age you are going to at some point face the fear and panic that we did.

Develop a simple plan for when your children get lost. Use ours if you like. One that is simple enough for a 2-year-old to learn.

By the way, we never had a problem with our third boy because he had a pull along squeaky toy that he always insisted on taking everywhere with him. Thus we always knew where he was.

But there was one other occasion that we lost one of our children. It was in our own home. The house went quite as it does when children are up to no good and suddenly one of our children was gone. The one with a good sense of direction. After what seemed like hours (though it was probably only about half an hour) of frantic searching his mother found him.

He was hiding under the bed laughing away. He thought it was very funny till he saw the look on his mother's face. The worst part about it was that despite ourselves it was actually very hard to keep a straight face as we told him off.

Enjoy
Sensai
Richard

Danger Stranger Tactics That Are Surprising

Danger Stranger Tactics May Surprise You

The surprising part is that we all use Danger Stranger Tactics, not just with strangers but with each other and though this is mostly a good thing it's not always in a good way.

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Using some of these tactics does not necessarily mean that you are a bad person with bad intentions. In fact, if all of us didn't use some of these tactics sometimes it would be very difficult to make friends. The problem comes when people use these things and similar, in a more manipulative way; particularly against children.

We all have natural boundaries and despite the tendency of some parts of our society to paint Fear as a thing of evil, we need our boundaries and our Fear.

Fear As A “Frenemy”

I teach my students that fear is a “Frenemy” (a word I first heard when one of my students chose to describe someone or something that is both a Friend and Enemy. A word I have since used many times). In other words, it is both a friend and a foe.

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"Fear is a Friend when it stops you from doing the things you shouldn't do

Fear is an Enemy when it stops you from doing the things you should do".

Boundary-Lowering”

When people use any kind of tactic to manipulate someone, into doing something they would not normally do it is called “Boundary-Lowering”. It is a form of manipulation that has been used by bad people not just strangers for a long time.

In fact, the term Danger Stranger has been outmoded for some time. Although it has its uses to describe certain people in certain situations, it has long been known that those who are vulnerable, including kids, are so much more from those they know than those they don't know. It is therefore critical to understand Boundary-lowering tactics in order to teach others how to see through them.

Good Knowledge

Gavin de Becker is a violence prediction expert and best-selling author. In his ground-breaking and mind opening book , "Gift of Fear" he sets out a list of such tactics. This is a must-read for any intelligent and self-respecting self-defence proponent.

Irene van der Zande, Kidpower Executive Director, in her article: Boundary-Lowering Tactics to Understand takes the time to give detail to that list

Both the article and the book deserve your time. Do not be lulled into a sense of false security by thinking that since you have taught your kids about Danger Stranger that they are safe from such things. It takes very little to become more aware. Having knowledge always brings greater freedom and having correct knowledge always helps peace of mind.

Unlike popular media, this is good knowledge. Go and expand your knowledge and peace of mind now

Enjoy
Sensai
Richard

Secret Family Code or Family Safety Password Good or Not?

Secret Family Code Not So Hot

I’d always thought that a secret family code was a good idea. But as this article points out there are a number of serious flaws.

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Now I have to confess that I am not convinced that the arguments presented mean that you should never use a secret code. For those who are able and practised, I think that it still has some merit. But if you are going to use one you need to supplement it with other skills; like maintaining a safe distance in any situation particularly unexpected ones.

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Anyway, give the article a read. You will have to join kid power to do it but it's free and they don’t hassle you and more importantly, they are a great organization and source of knowledge.

Enjoy
Sensai
Richard

Child Safety: Putting Safety and Well-Being First

Don't Dismiss child Safety

One of the Slogans of Kid Power on child safety is: I WILL Put the Safety and Well-Being of Young People Ahead of Anyone’s Embarrassment, Inconvenience or Offense!

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The Video below is the Kid power protection promise. A Promise that I believe every Parent, Guardian, Teacher, Coach and a responsible adult should make to their kids.

Too many times things get swept under the carpet. Too many times, even today, we consider that children should be seen and not heard.

There has to be a point at which it stops.

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But only when adults stand up for kids; Only when kids can be heard; only when we refuse to dismiss the inconvenience and embarrassment of having to deal with uncomfortable situations, will the harm to our children stop.

Children need to know that they will be taken seriously.

Yes, they will tell tails. But if you don't close them down you can teach them the difference between "Telling" and "Telling Tails". You can teach them that you can be trusted with what they tell you.

If we make the commitment to them they will reciprocate.

Watch the video below and make the commitment. Don't give up on child safety, You will not regret it.

Enjoy
Sensai
Richard

Walk To School: Talk Walk And Practice With Your Kids

Is It Safe For You Kids To Walk to School By Themselves?

It is possible to get the impression that it is never safe for your children to walk to school without an armed escort these days. But there are countries in the world where it is considered most unusual if not unacceptable for a child, not to be walking to school by themselves almost as soon as they are old enough to go to school.

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Based on this information there are many parents reconsidering their protectiveness of their children and trying to figure out just how they can give them more independence without increasing the risk.

If you are one of these parents then you may want to read this pdf.

Walking Back From School

There are quite a few things to consider in preparation for walking to school, beyond the usual things of which way do you go; what roads do you cross and how do you go about crossing the roads. Things like "how do you handle strangers?"; where do you go to get help if you need it?; what do you do in an emergency? and a whole bunch of other issues.

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But most of all you need to practice. Teach them the rules then walk with them and reinforce the rules. Once you are sure they have mastered the rules let them walk a little ahead of you then as you are sure they a getting it lingers behind them.

This is nothing to do with spying or lack of confidence in your child and everything to do with making sure they have a thorough grasp of the rules.

Not all of your concerns will be dealt with by the article but it will go a long way to getting your child to walk to school by themselves if that is what you want.

Enjoy
Sensai
Richard

Child Lost While Shopping Or Any Place: What If It's mine?

Avoid the Panic of a Child Lost

Every parent's nightmare is to be out and about and suddenly discover your child lost. Even though they were just beside you, they are now suddenly not. What should you do?

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I don't care how good your supervision is, sooner or later a child in your care is going to go missing. But panic does not have to be your first response. If you have worked with the child, even for only a few minutes a week you can end up with a working system that can have them back in your care in no time flat.

How do I know this?

Because I'm a parent and I have a system and it works. You can read all about my safety tips for kids.

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But not everybody will want to adopt my plan. So let me direct you to another article about avoiding the child lost scenario. This one is by Kid Power and it is called "What If I Get Lost? – Kidpower Skills to Prepare Children to Get Help".

For the parent that likes detail, this is an ideal article for you. It covers:

• Making a Safety Plan
• What to Do If You Get Lost
• The Backup Plan
• Practising How to Get Help if You Get Lost

Lost Child

I really encourage you to make some sort of "What to do when you find your child lost" plan. In our busy lives, it could be seen as just another thing that you have to do. But if you include it in your lifestyle and only talk about it as you are preparing to go out, all you need do is re-enforce the plan as you are walking about. It is not really that time consuming and it could save your child's life one day. Isn't that worth a little time?

Having said that let me plead with you that you read up on plans like the ones above when making your plan. I have worked with children all my working life and then some and many of the plans I hear that parents have are just ... Well, shall we be kind and say that they are less than adequate. For example, this is a very common one:

"I tell [child's name] that if they can't find me they should look for a policeman and they will come and find me"

Often with such a plan the carer has not even prepared the child by getting them to memorize a phone number or address, let alone considering the risks of a lost child wandering all over the place in the search for a policeman (and sometimes these plans are very specific that it be a man), that may not even be on that beat, let alone on foot.

What about this plan:

"I tell [child's name] that if they can't find me they should look for the help desk and they will come and find me"

How do you know if they're even is a help desk and if there is, what floor is it on? If your child is on the 5th floor and the help desk is on the first: how will they find that?

Consider also that such plans require you to have come up with a specific plan for every situation and no child can cope with so much information. Beside such plans are rarely organized in advanced, they are usually talked about whilst you are walking about. There is a very good chance that your child is not going to take that in whilst there is a heap of other distractions.

The above are real plans that I have heard from real parents. I have not made them up. If you have something similar you need to rethink your plan and come up with something better. The best way of doing that is to read the articles links above. I'm sure you will be able to use that information to come up with a really good plan so that there will be no child lost in your care.

Enjoy
    Sensai
        Richard

Kids Self Defense: The Joy And Danger Of Keeping Secrets

Kids Self Defense: The Joy And Danger Of Keeping Secrets

Kids self-defence and the joy and danger of keeping secrets is one of the biggest problems when it comes to kids safety.

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Secrets are a big part of a child's life particularly, as they move to years 4 and above of their education. There is tremendous joy in keeping secret that birthday, Christmas or other gifts that you are planning on giving to someone. Little can give more joy than saying nothing about that surprise party or vacation. You just can't beat a secret that will give someone pleasure or enhance a relationship.

Keeping quiet about something because you care about someone or because it keeps you safe and it is safe to keep quiet or because you don't want to give away your study groups best ideas before it is handed in. These are all good things to keep to yourself until the appropriate time to share them comes.

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The relationship between kids self-defence and Secrets

But secrets are also potentially dangerous. The wrong secret can be extremely damaging, emotionally and even physically. Some secrets can even be life-threatening.

Good kids self defense teachers about secrets.

So how do you teach a child the difference between a good secret and a bad one? There is no easy answer to this however, there are some things that can be done.

Secrets Can Be A Joy or Dangerous

I came across this article about "What Kinds of Secrets Are Okay for Children to Keep – And What Kinds Are Not?

This is some excellent advice. I recommend that every parent should read it but not just for the children. There are ideas here that I think should be applied to adults as well.

Enjoy
Sensai
Richard

Stranger Danger Program is A Complete Failure

Going For Something Better Than The Stranger Danger

It is time we junked the Stranger Danger program for something better. 

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It was considered a major breakthrough in the protection of kids from the stranger that was just waiting to pick up your child the moment you had your back turned. It was so revolutionary that it was rapidly picked up by schools and institutions, parents and teachers alike. This was going to be the thing that saved our kids.

And then came the clanger. It didn't work! Well, that's not altogether true; it did have some effect. There was an improvement in vigilance and there probably were some children that were made safer. But the problem was the realization that most assaults on children were not and still are not carried out by strangers. It's just not that simple.

It's The Relatives

It's the relatives, the trusted scoutmaster, the trusted priest, the trusted teacher, the trusted baby sitter. How are we to protect against all that trust? Do we just teach kids not to trust anybody? Do we refuse to trust ourselves?

Well, that won't work either. You can't live life without trust. It becomes a complete disaster when you teach kids not to trust. What happens when you need help and the only person available is a stranger? For that matter, most of the people that we rely on for help, the ones we know we can trust were strangers once. How can we possibly help our children to navigate through life if we teach them nothing but mistrust?

Let's face it, the Stranger Danger program is dead, unfortunately, no one has told anybody yet including the educational institutions that we rely on to pass on this information to us and our children. We still have this program preached from much of the Media and many schools.

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Teach Us How To Deal Correctly With Strangers

We have to teach our children and each other, how to deal correctly with strangers but not just a stranger. We have to learn how to deal with each other so that we can build trust.

The following article shows that there are people out there that are working hard to change our thinking. But teaching such self-defence is not easy. The problem is the original program was simple. Knowing how to build trust and mutually beneficial relationships is not. Still read this article it helps.

Enjoy
Sensai
Richard

Emotional Problems: Help, My Student / Child Has A Problem

Emotional Problems: Just listen

Getting more than you bargained for when you ask "what's wrong?" Every good instructor, coach, youth worker, teacher and anybody else for that matter will have to confront the issue of a child sharing with them some emotional problems.

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If you are any good as a coach, you not only want your students to be good martial artists but you want them to be better people. I know I want my students to learn as many life lessons as possible.

I recognize that you are not their parent but your students will put into practice what you teach them whether you want them to or not. I am always very proud when a parent comes to me and tells me how pleased they were to watch their child put into practice one or several of the skills I teach to help with stress.

Even If You Don't Want That Kind Of Relationship

Even if you don't want that kind of relationship, there are children nowadays that will insist on sharing with you; if they trust you and you should be prepared to help them as best you can.

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Unlike in my youth were I remember, with some resentment, I must say a lot of adults that insisted you just be quiet and do what they say; no matter what the problem is. You should be ashamed of yourself if you still think that way.

It may not seem a serious problem; at least not to you, but to the child, it is every bit as important as any of your own emotional problems.

So if a child comes to you with a problem what should you do?

What If You Were To Find Out Later

You could of course be like the adults that resented and ignore the child. But what if you were to find out later that your lack of listening resulted in the child having a real problem or worse and you discovered that you could have helped?

This article deals with children who share possible abuse, bullying or harassment, but it also covers how to deal with ordinary problems. And let's face it, it is a very real possibility that you have to confront the other issues one day. So if the information overlaps even better.

Of course, being in Australia I'm sure you all know that when it says:

"If the child may be in immediate danger, call 9-1-1 and keep the child with you."

You should call 000 instead (9-1-1 = 000 in Australian ed.)

Enjoy
Sensai
Richard